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In the beginning...

66 votes

Submitted by Bdog2g2 2 months ago

Follow the donut, and paradise shall be yours.

  1. IT HAS BEGUN!!!! THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER SHALL FALL! ALL HAIL THE ERA OF THE DONUT! THE PROPHET HAS ALREADY APPEARED AND SALIVATION SHALL BE OURS!!! (Did I say salivation? Well salvation is what I meant..oh screw it.)

  2. I am blinded by its beauty! The glaze shines beyond all others! I weep, for I am not worthy.

  3. @robdiana
    @SilentJay74

    Patience, for all shall be revealed in time.

  4. you even got the domain... lol nice effort :P

  5. @Bdog2g2
    careful now. If you write a book about it, people might start following you...

  6. @nowsourcing

    it worked for Dr. Phil.

  7. @Bdog2g2
    heh, that's not what I was referring to. Still you are right. Dr. Phil could write a book tomorrow and have followers. Something like "The order of getting real about your fat" or something like that.

  8. All hail Donut Eye Joe!

  9. People, be careful, this is an evil sect!

    Only Flying Spaghetti Monster Church can show you THE TRUTH! Repent immediately!

  10. @MishaA
    HEATHEN!
    The sprinkes will rain down upon you with great might and furious icing!

  11. @MishaA

    BLASPHEMY!!!!

    May ye be burned by the hot coffee that is his blood.

  12. My friends, you're point is self defeating. If you;re looking for the truth just read the Gospel and ask the Lord FSM to reveal Himself to you. And when He comes tugging at your heart, don't resist Him, let Him in and you'll be free. :D

  13. @MishaA
    The FSM cannot with stand an onslaught of sprinkles and chocolate. The donut shall prevail and all will bask in it's glory.

  14. Donuts is not letting me follow it ........ ^o)

  15. hmmm, nice donut

  16. @jansie

    you are now a Donite!!!

  17. @Bdog2g2 ah, the secret order of the donites. can i be a caramel cream donite? or do you have to work yourself up to that one?

  18. For 7 days now I have been held captive by The Nomadelle. I was walking late one night through a parking lot when she bewitched me into lifting a sofa into the back of her van under the guise of a weak damsel in distress. It was whilst in the back of the van that she maced and then chloroformed me, I awoke to find myself in a pit she had dug into the foundations of a house basement.

    "It rubs the sprinkles into its skin!" she would holler from above. I survived only on jam and savoury pasties which she would lower down to me in a bucket. The fattening of a donut sacrifice. Finally I made good my escape by crafting a pastry crust step-ladder which I fashioned in total darkness when The Nomadelle was out stalking, presumably satiating her blood lust.

    Can't stop long....I need to put distance between myself and The Nomadelle. What I can say is that in my darkest hours, and after much contemplation, my spirit was lifted to a higher consciousness and several revelations were made known to me. Joe has been sent to reunite warring peoples, people that for centuries have been locked in mortal conflict. I am of course referring to Pirates and Ninjas. Only when united can The Nomadelle be confronted successfully. Inner circle Ninjas have long protected the secret covenant promised to Donut Joe, kept secret until the time of awakening. Think about it....where do ninjas train? In DoJos! Donut Joe.....Do.Jo.

    It all becomes clear, how did the Donut Eye Joe choose to reveal himself....by holding a donut up to his eye as if a Pirate's eye patch!

    Pirates, Ninjas.....UNITE!

  19. mmm ... forbidden donut ... glllll ....

  20. Okay I was planning to follow the donut, but my dog eat it.... Do I now follow the dog? questions questions...hahaha

  21. mmmm.....chocolate......donut.....

    • Savoy6 Savoy6
    • added 2 months ago, edited 2 months ago

    My faith is true, I shall not be tempted by thy donut as I am a memeber of the Allied Atheist Alliance. This is obviously a trick by the United Atheist Alliance or the United Atheist League.

  23. @Savoy6 Pffft United Atheist Alliance or United Atheist League....it's the Peoples Front of Atheism!
    <Monty Python reference>

  24. @SilentJay74

    People's Front of Atheism! Right I'm telling my friends in the The Atheism People's Front- they might want a word with you.

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